Abortion attempt survivor. Voice for the voiceless.

As if the secrecy and shame that surrounds abortion isn’t silencing enough, there are doctors like Hodari who not only allegedly forced a woman to have an abortion but literally silenced her during the process, and likewise, for over a year afterwards.  I first read this article on Thursday night, and then ended up listening to Dr. Alveda King on Al Kresta in the Afternoon on Friday, where she, too, told her own personal story of having an abortion forced on her and the silence that ensued for many years after.  On the other side of the abortion, there is my own personal story of being silenced by the shame and guilt of “being different” from everyone else I knew and also for surviving and thriving, whereas millions of children just like me have not been as lucky.  Truly, silence is DEATH-ENING.

FLINT, MI, November 18, 2009/Christian Newswire –

A recently filed lawsuit against troubled abortionist Abraham Alberto Hodari alleging a horrific forced abortion may explain his recent efforts to sell off his abortion clinics.

On June 17, 2009, Caitlin Bruce filed a suit against Hodari and his assistant, “Victor”, over an incident that took place at Hodari’s Flint, MI, abortion clinic in April 2008. In that suit, Ms. Bruce alleges that she went to Hodari’s clinic seeking an abortion, but before the procedure began, she changed her mind and decided against it. She notified Hodari that she no longer wanted the abortion.

However, Hodari and his assistant, Victor, forcibly restrained Ms. Bruce, holding her down. Ms. Bruce screamed “Stop, stop, I don’t want this,” but her mouth was covered to muffle her pleas while Hodari forced the abortion upon her.

Included in the suit are 6 counts against Hodari, including lack of informed consent/medical malpractice, battery, fraud, misrepresentation, intentional infliction of emotional distress, and ethnic/gender intimidation.

Michigan has a statute that forbids intimidation based on gender or ethnicity. Ms. Bruce believes that Hodari forced the abortion on her because she is Black. Statistics show that the abortion industry disproportionately targets Black women.

“This man should be in jail,” said Operation Rescue President Troy Newman. “To avoid having to pay for his crimes, it looks like Hodari is trying to liquidate his assets, take the money, and run.”

This is not the first incident of forced abortion for which Hodari has been accused. In February, former Hodari patient Jennifer McCoy came forward and told Operation Rescue of her 1988 abortion at age 16. McCoy never intended to get an abortion and was lured to Hodari’s clinic under the false pretenses that she would be receiving her first obstetrical examination. Instead, Hodari forced an abortion on her. He then returned her to a 40-year old high school teacher who had fathered the baby in a relationship that qualified as statutory rape. McCoy attempted unsuccessfully to have Hodari criminally charged. (Read full story.)

“Over a twenty year period, we can only imagine how many times Hodari has done this to women. If we know of two, you can bet there were more that we don’t know about,” said Newman. “It is one depraved man that could do that to women.”

Hodari was placed on probation in February for illegally dumping medical records. In March, he was fined a mere $10,000 for his part in the death of Regina Johnson. Hodari has been involved in at least three additional abortion deaths.

“Over the years, Michigan authorities have continually covered for Hodari’s criminal actions. They bear some responsibility for the abuse suffered by women because they know Hodari is a menace, but have done nothing to stop him,” said Newman.

After one short day at home, I headed back down (by myself this time) to Texas, Belton to be exact, to meet with pro-life students, residential assistants, and also to speak at chapel. Although I was excited about speaking on a college campus again (it had been over six months since I had last spoke at one), I was missing my daughter and feeling drained when I headed out the morning of November 10th. Any apprehension that I had about being back out speaking again after one day’s rest melted away when I met up with Chaplain George Loutherback (aka, “Dr. L.”) and Amanda, one of the officers of Cru4Life, UMHB’s relatively new pro-life student group, at the Killeen airport.

A quick aside here, which I think is pretty interesting stuff….when we left the Dallas airport to head to Killeen, the flight attendant notified us that although our trip would be a quick 31 minutes, President Obama was scheduled to leave Killeen (where he was attending the memorial service for the victims of Ft. Hood), at about the same time we were scheduled to land, so there could be a change in our arrival time. We landed in Killeen on time, without fanfare, but as I looked out of the window to my left, I could see Air Force One sitting there. (I have included a picture below, although it is far from great). As we left the airport and traveled through Ft. Hood, there were a large number of military and police personnel patrolling the area.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand…I had spoken with Dr. L. a few times by phone in the past month and had thoroughly enjoyed my talks with him, and meeting him in person simply solidified for me what a great man of faith, character, and leadership he is. It can be hard sometimes, heading out to place after place, meeting person after person, and although most of us always click in terms of our personalities and beliefs, some people are just easier to get to know and more comfortable to be around. Dr. L. and all of the students and staff that I met at UMHB were some of the most approachable, committed, faithful folks that I have met throughout my travels, and I thoroughly enjoyed my time with them.

I started Tuesday evening off by having dinner with Dr. L. and the four student officers of Cru4Life-Amanda, Eva, Nikita, and Ashley at the Olive Garden. We had a nice, relaxing meal together and shared our personal stories of how we’ve gotten to who we are/where we are in life, and we talked about a wide range of topics, from pro-life student activism, to the barriers that are encountered on campus and in a secular society, to my story and what it was like for me as a college student (MANY YEARS BEFORE). (I have to add that last piece in, because although I love being around high school and college students because of their energy, enthusiasm, and fresh perspective on life, I am increasingly aware that I am getting increasingly older. Bless their hearts, some students later remarked that they thought I was a student, but they must not have looked close enough to see the gray hairs on my head and the wrinkles around my eyes!)

We headed out from dinner to the UMHB campus, where the Cru4Life group was holding their weekly meeting at 7:00. Although attendance fluxgates from week to week, there were over 20 students in attendance that evening, and I was very pleased that this included a number of male students.

I was impressed not only by the number of students present for the meeting, but also with the preparation that students had done by researching pro-life news around the world to share with the group. I never pretend to know everything about what’s going on in the pro-life culture, but I was very surprised to learn that evening that the largest Planned Parenthood clinic in the world is currently being built in Houston. I pray that children like me are spared from abortion at this clinic and are given the chance that they deserve at life.

We spent the evening together discussing the prevalence of abortion on college campuses (and the likelihood that even some in that very room that night had likely experienced an abortion), what impacts college women to have abortions, and the resources and supports that men and women facing pregnancy and parenting most need from their campus, their faculty and their peers. Like many college students that I have met, it was easy for them to identify what drives college women to have abortions: lack of emotional support, fear, being shamed and blamed for becoming pregnant (yes, even on Christian campuses), coercion by friends, family, and partners, lack of knowledge about resources and supports available to them and how to access them. However, when it came time to identify what resources were available (like Title 19, Food Stamps, FIP, pregnancy resource centers, WIC, campus housing, etc), the students found it much harder to identify how a pregnant or parenting student would go about finding these resources and how they, as pro-life leaders could help them to access them.

I certainly don’t blame them; their experience is not unique, even for a group of pro-life student leaders. I am glad that we got the conversation started that night about what expectant parents may need, and I am excited about continuing to support them in their efforts in addressing this area for themselves and their peers. Although resources and supports are key in supporting pregnant and parenting students, I think that the most important thing we discussed that night together was about how to talk to and treat pregnant and parenting students-with love and compassion, genuine care, not shaming, blaming or judging them for their circumstances or choices.

We wrapped our time together for the night with me sharing part of my personal story with them. I didn’t want to give it all away, since I was speaking the next morning at chapel, but I wanted them to have the opportunity to spend time with me in a more intimate setting and hear things from me that I likely wouldn’t have time to say the next day. It was a very moving experience for both the students and myself, as we sat together in a circle that night and looked at the true reality of abortion and how it has impacted my life and everyone around me. Although I didn’t want to tell them “everything,” a number of students didn’t want to have to wait until the next day to hear the rest of the story, and some just couldn’t make it to chapel, so we convened the meeting and headed to a small chapel so that I could continue sharing my testimony with about ten students. It is such a different experience to be sitting face to face with people instead of standing at a podium or on a stage, and the depth of our emotions and the presence of the Lord were palpable that evening as we continued our time together.

There were the gasps, sighs, and tears that often come about as I give my testimony, and I was moved that they were so moved by my story and the power of God’s grace, but so, too, was I moved by my time with them. I always feel the Holy Spirit move through me when I speak (and it certainly lingers for hours afterwards, which can be a problem when I speak late at night and then can’t sleep), but there are moments in time where I can just see the Lord in the room when I speak, and that night was certainly one of those nights. And just like always, I was not surprised by the gift that the Lord gave me that night, when a young woman stayed after to speak with me. “I was scared to come here tonight and meet you,” she started off by saying. She went on to share that she had had an abortion in high school, coerced into doing so by her verbally abusive boyfriend, who made her undertake the process alone. “I was afraid of what you would look like….I just didn’t think that I could handle it.” I certainly understood what she was saying. When you hear that someone like me has survived a lethal attempt on their life, should have burned from the outside-in, and was told by doctors that they would likely have any one of a number of disabilities, you don’t know what to expect when you meet them. I am grateful to the Lord for my health and my well-being, and I know that the Lord had a plan when he not only saved me but made me healthy and whole, for I am a reflection of him, and I am also a reflection of each and every one of those beautiful children whose lives have been ended by abortion.

I had a wonderful heart to heart with my young friend, who is fortunately but unfortunately wise beyond her years, and she has a beautiful story to tell, that I hope that she someday comes forward with publicly. In the few short years since the abortion, she has grown exponentially as a person. She’s born again in her faith, she’s forgiven her child’s father and now befriended him in Christ, she’s worked through her grief and loss through the Forgiven and Set Free bible study, and has found a way to memorialize her unborn child and find the purpose and meaning behind her experiences. She is a true inspiration to me and she is the kind of woman that I want to pattern myself after. Spending time with this young woman was a great finish to the evening.

Blessing of all blessings, I had the rare opportunity, traveling alone, to sleep in the next morning, which was a great way to start the day. After calling home to check on Olivia and the rest of the house, I made my way to the UMHB campus. It was a beautiful morning, and I had the opportunity to tour the campus (by golf cart ) with Dr. L., which is truly one of the most picture-perfect campuses I’ve seen. Between the people and the campus, I must admit that I could easily be swayed to join them in Belton sometime-permanently!

Chapel was held at 11:00 Wednesday morning. After a very moving invocation from a student who is also a member of the armed services, which honored our fellow veteran’s, we had the opportunity to share in the music of Scattered Leaves, a Christian band from Maryland. They were awesome! I didn’t know if or how I was going to get and keep the students’ attention when it came time for me to speak right after them, but the Lord was present by my side as always, and the students and faculty present listened whole-heartedly to my testimony for the next 30 minutes. As always, I had written a specific speech for this very event, but once again, it wasn’t needed. I know my story by heart, but the Lord guided me on the other points to make with the students about how we are ALL impacted by abortion, how we were ALL just one step away from being me, the only difference being that their mother chose life, that we all have a role to play in respecting and protecting life, we simply need to tap into our God-given strengths and talents to help make the world a better place.

Following chapel, a number of the Residential Life staff took me out for some great Mexican food , and we spent time again talking about the needs and resources available to their students, the resources available to help students help provide support to other students, and the role that they can play in assisting their students. It was a great finish to a great morning and a nice transition for my trip back home.

After chapel that day, and even since thereafter, I have heard from a number of students and staff who have shared their own personal stories about abortion and adoption in their lives, and found my time with them to be inspirational and educational. I am certainly grateful that I made an impact in their lives, but I am equally grateful that they made an impact on my life. Their commitment to their faith, their dedication to doing good works for others, and their belief in respecting and protecting children just like me will have a lasting impression on me throughout my life.

Plans are underway to get me back to UMHB next October to speak with students again on the annual Day of Solidarity. I look forward to seeing everyone again at UMHB soon!

I don’t always have time to write about all of the events that I speak at, but they are always memorable for one reason or another. And although my speaking at St. Joseph’s parish in Anthon, Iowa, on October 22nd, seemed on first glance to be just another small event on my part (less than 50 present), it was certainly a mighty one.

I was very blessed to have my husband, daughter, mother and Aunt Nadine, present, along with a number of my mother and aunt’s friends and acquaintances, which always makes an event eventful to me! There were a number of CCD students present, along with their parents, which I always enjoy, also.

I learned long ago, never to take for granted that the audience members where I speak, even in a church or parish, are pro-life, and so I started off my time with them by letting them know that I wasn’t there to convince them to be pro-life or shame or blame anyone for their personal beliefs or for having had an abortion or encouraging or supporting a woman in having one. Just like I always do, I encouraged them to simply keep an open heart and mind as I shared my testimony with them.

Having my family present when I speak always makes me emotional, and having a shrieking toddler wanting her mommy that night kept me grounded and my time with them pretty light, but I think that all of the little idiosyncrasies made the evening a down to earth meeting and an up close and personal look at the reality of abortion on our lives.

I met a number of wonderful people in Anthon that night, including a young lady who shared with me that she had two other siblings who had passed away from parental neglect, and could therefore relate to me about what it was like to be a survivor and be grateful for life. As if that wasn’t enough, I later found out from my mother that one of the adult women present that night was pro-choice, and came to the event out of her own curiosity to hear me speak. The day after the event at St. Joseph’s, this woman shared with her closest friends that although she came to the parish that evening pro-choice, she experienced a conversion that evening when hearing me speak, and now was pro-life!

Beautiful, isn’t it, that this woman kept an open heart and mind and let my story resonate in her soul?! It is moments like this, impacts like this, that I don’t always hear about when I share my story around the world. I am certainly grateful that this woman experienced a conversion of the heart and mind, and even more so that she was willing to share this conversion with others, so that they, too, could be impacted by it. Getting the opportunity to hear about it, myself….well, that’s just icing on the cake.

Where, oh where has the last month gone?! I was so blessed in October to speak at a number of events locally and across the nation, and I have been fully planning to write about them but the month of October certainly got away from me, and here it is November 12th already. Better late than never, I guess!

The month of October started out with speaking at a local parish in Moville, Iowa, at the Immaculate Conception. Although the number of attendees compared to national events was small (less than 50), it was still a joy to meet with all of the parishioners present, share my testimony of God’s grace, the true reality of abortion, and the power of love, hope, and forgiveness with all of them. And as always, I was humbled by the compassion of the parishioners and was moved by their own personal stories about how abortion and adoption had touched their lives.

One young woman, in particular, holds a special place in my heart who was in attendance. Although she had not been impacted yet by abortion in her life, she had been impacted by adoption. As a pre-teen, this beautiful, bright young lady had been removed from the custody of her biological mother due to her mother’s neglect and abuse of her and her siblings. She has since remained in foster care for a number of years, and although her mother’s parental rights were not terminated to her, due to her age and relationship with her mother, she will remain in foster care until she reaches adulthood.

What struck me about this young lady was that although our experiences as foster/adoptive children were certainly quite different, we could still relate to one another in terms of being children that are often viewed as unwanted or unloved. And just like me, she was not unloved or unwanted and has been in the same amazing foster home for many years now, where she plans to remain until she ages out of the foster care system. Just like I had found a wonderful adoptive home, she had found a wonderful foster home that isn’t just a foster home to her. It is her home, her family.

On Sunday, October 11th, I hit the skies for the first time in almost a year, heading out to Washington D.C. for the International Week of Prayer and Fasting. Not only was I blessed with this amazing opportunity to give my testimony about the power of prayer and the impact of abortion with the attendees of the event, but so, too, was I blessed to have my adoptive mother, Linda, one of my aunts, Gladys, and my daughter, Olivia traveling with me. Traveling with a toddler definitely poses its own unique struggles, but it was well worth it to have my dearest Olivia with me on this trip!

That evening, my mother and I attended the fundraising dinner for the International Week of Prayer and Fasting at the Omni Shoreham Hotel (while Aunt Gladys so kindly cared for Olivia upstairs in our hotel room). It was a grand affair, and held many of the “who’s who” of the Catholic faith and Pro-Life movement. At our table alone sat Maureen Flynn, founder of the International Week of Prayer and Fasting, Father Machado from Rome, Former Senator Rick Santorium, and Jennifer O’Neill, among others. Both Mr. Santorium and Ms. O’Neill received two of the pro-life awards given out, and Mr. Santorium later went on to give the keynote speech for the evening.

Prior to Mr. Santorium’s eloquent and inspirational keynote, however, I was able to “take the podium” and share my testimony of surviving a failed abortion attempt and the story and glory of the Lord’s hand in my life with the audience. I am always humbled by the response of individuals and groups everywhere I go, but by far, the gracious response of this audience full of the venerable “who’s-who” meant the world to me. To have a group of individuals, who themselves are leaders and visionaries in the Catholic faith and pro-life movement give me a standing ovation was a surreal moment to me. As if that wasn’t enough, I was doubly blessed to have my own mother there, tears in her eyes as she listened to me speak and saw the compassion of the audience in return to the telling of not just my story, but her story, too.

I was honored to meet so many wonderful people that night, and had a moving conversation with Randall Terry in the outside courtyard, but by far, I was most moved by meeting a father and daughter that evening who were in attendance. We had a lengthy discussion about the difficulty of being a pro-life student on a college campus that was not very supportive of the cause for life, and the struggles that all of us as pro-lifers often have in facing a predominant culture, at least in terms of mainstream media, that is pro-choice. Although I heard many moving stories that evening about how abortion and adoption had affected people’s lives, there was just something special about having this father and daughter present, two generations that have been impacted by abortion, yet two generations that stood strong in their faith and commitment to the unborn that really touched my heart that night. Maybe it was the fact that we shared a warm group hug with one another as we ended the evening that got me (it certainly didn’t hurt)!

After a good night’s sleep (as good of a night’s sleep as you get with a toddler taking up half your bed), we headed out the next morning to the Basilica of the Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. If you haven’t been there, I would highly recommend it. It is truly a sight to behold, both inside and out. I had been looking forward to speaking at the Prayer Service for so long, and it certainly lived up to my hopes and expectations. With attendees and speakers from around the globe, it was the most diverse group that I had yet had the opportunity to speak to. I had the wonderful chance to watch and listen as the African nations shared the Divine Mysteries with the audience immediately prior to my speech. As they spoke in both their native tongue and in English, I was struck by just how blessed I have been in my life to participate in events like this.

My speech went off without a hitch (except for when I went to have my mother bring Olivia to the stage so that I could introduce her to the crowd and she was sleeping in her stroller ), and although the chapel that I was speaking in was HUGE, I could see from the stage that they got my message loud and clear, tears streaming down many faces, they were moved by my testimony of the power of prayer, God’s grace and sovereignty over suffering, and the impact of abortion in my life and in our world.

As I left the stage after speaking, I was met with a host of individuals from around the world, including Greece, Poland, China, and Ghana, who greeted me warmly, hugged me, and requested to have their photo taken with Olivia and myself and information about me so that they could continue to pray for me. Words can not express how much such a warm reception meant to me and to my mother and aunt, for that matter.

I later had the opportunity to listen to Jennifer O’Neill provide her personal testimony about having an abortion, suffering miscarriages and many other painful experiences in her life, and ultimately her salvation in finding the Lord. I feel very honored to have been in the presence of a woman who has had so much yet is at the same time very humble, indeed. After lunching with Jennifer and other speakers for the day, I had the blessed chance to meet Father Frank Pavone briefly before he took the stage for his speech.

Although we didn’t have long to speak, I feel honored to have been in his presence, and pray that we get the chance to speak with one another again soon about how we can work together to share our ministries about the true reality of abortion with the world. After my brief encounter with Father Pavone, I excitedly got to listen to him speak in person, for the first time. And although I always enjoy listening to him on the radio and watching him on EWTN, his presence in person is astounding. I would have loved the opportunity to meet with him more after his speech, but Miss Olivia made it clear that her little toddler self had just about reached the end of her rope for the day and we headed back to our hotel for the afternoon and headed back to Iowa the next day.

Even though I like to think that I am rather eloquent with both the written and spoken word, I don’t think that I can truly express to all of you what a blessed time we had in Washington for the International Week of Prayer and Fasting…..it was a chance of a lifetime, and I hope and pray that I have the opportunity to cross paths with the wonderful folks that I met there again someday, and likewise, I hope and pray that there are many more events like this to come.

Included here are a couple of pictures from the event:

Lunch with Jennifer O'Neill (in picture), Colleen Flynn, Mom, Olivia, Aunt Gladys, among others

I was blessed with the opportunity to have a busy week last week (hence why I’m just getting to this now)! On Tuesday, November 2nd, I participated in a radio interview with Indiana Right to Life, which was aired on the local Catholic radio station in the Evansville area.

Then, on Thursday, November 5th, my adoptive mother, Linda, and my daughter, Olivia, flew with me to Evansville, Indiana, where I spoke at a private donor event for Indiana Right to Life and specifically, Vanderburgh County Right to Life.

Over 90 attendees were present, which was the highest attendance record yet! My mother, Olivia, and I had the wonderful opportunity to bear witness to the glory of God, the true reality of abortion, and the full impact that abortion has on individuals and families across generations. It was truly our honor to meet the wonderful people of Vanderburgh Right to Life and Indiana Right to Life–they were a very attentive and responsive crowd, and were many of the great who’s-who of life movement individuals in Indiana–it was very humbling and an honor to meet them. If you have not checked out the website yet for teensforlife.com, I would certainly encourage you to. Teens for Life is a wonderful social networking site for teens, and Indiana is, in my opinion, one of the most progressive states in the life movement. The attendees of the event were compassionate, Mike Fichter of Indiana Right to Life was kind enough to give me a copy of his new book, Viability, which I have enjoyed reading immensely.

After a few hours of sleep (I was still running on the energy of speaking at the donor event and excited but nervously looking forward to the next morning), I had the blessed opportunity to participate in an interview with Gus Lloyd, who is the host of the radio show Seize the Day on the Catholic Channel (XM channel 131 , Sirius channel 160). I plan to post a copy of this interview later, after I’ve received a copy. Not to be biased (since I am writing about myself), I thought that the interview went very well, (even though I was giving the interview while standing outside of the hotel in Evansville, freezing my rear-end off); it was probably the best interview that I’ve done yet. Of course, it certainly helps having an expert host such as Mr. Lloyd conducting it!

I ran from the interview and hopped into the car of one of Vanderburgh County Right to Life’s staff, who was kind enough to take us to the airport before heading to work for the day, herself. Gratefully, our travels were non-eventful (sans a meltdown by Olivia on the flight from Chicago to El Paso), and we arrived in beautiful, sunny El Paso in the afternoon. Unfortunately, Olivia was overly tired and too excited to take a nap in the afternoon and fell asleep at 5:50 PM. She desperately needed her sleep, so instead of both Mom and Olivia going to the House of Hope Car Raffle with me, they both stayed back at the hotel. I appreciate my mom’s willingness to stay back with her, but sure wish that they both could have come to the dinner and raffle.

It was an honor on my part to provide the keynote speech for House of Hope’s raffle and silent auction. I had met the director of the pregnancy resource center, Angelica Talavera, back in 2007, when we both started speaking for Feminists for Life, and we last saw each other back in January of 2008, when we spoke at the Students for Life Conference in D.C. Oh how our lives have changed since then! Angelica is now married, we both now have children, we have both grown and matured personally, professionally and in our faith.

Knowing that many individuals who are pro-choice attend the event, since it really is a fantastic chance to win a car or a trip for little cost, I supported and encouraged the audience to have an open heart and mind to my story, emphasized the true reality of abortion in our lives, the pain and grief and suffering that it causes, encouraged them to use their God-given strengths and talents to improve their community for women, children and all family members, and reminded them that they were all just one step away from being just like me-the only difference is that their mother chose choice (among the other high points I hit in my testimony).

I was very pleased with the reception of the audience, and was once again surprised by the stories that others had to tell about abortion and adoption. One man in particular shared with me how much he was moved by my story, as he had gotten a woman pregnant in college, and in his own words, gratefully, she chose life for her child, which is something that he can’t say that he would have done at the time. He would have supported her in having an abortion. He is now blessed to have finally met his daughter now that she is an adult, and I could just tell by looking at him, that although my story brought up some painful pieces of his past, the Lord certainly intended for him to be there to hear my story and reflect on his own life.

I had a wonderful time at the rest of the raffle and auction that evening (I had never seen a raffle done like that before, so I was easily entertained by the process)! We were fortunate enough to have all day Saturday to relax in El Paso and spend time with my friend Angie and her family. We flew back home on Sunday the 8th, and although it was good to be home, we truly enjoyed our busy days and nights in Indiana and Texas!